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Right there with you, Danielle! Knitting is very high on my list! The kit sits awaiting for me in my closet. ;)
Hi Rachel:
You’re SO not alone! 3-4 is a MASSIVE shift in development, where children generally fall into 1 of 2 camps: I can do it by myself! or I can’t do this! Surprisingly, in both areas, they’re simply asserting independence!
A few things could potentially help, but like all things parenting-related, your daughter will be out of this stage before you know it. ;)
1 — Ask for her help often.
On totally unrelated subjects, ask her what she thinks about certain things, or if she can do certain tasks (that you know she’s fully able to do), because you really need her help. She might simply need evidence and proof that she’s far more reliable and skilled than she realizes!
2 — Break it up into steps.
“Show me the hard part” works really well for this, b/c it naturally pinpoints an actual hang-up. But sometimes there isn’t a hang-up, it’s just a classic case of overwhelm! By breaking it up into steps (assisting her w/ some of the project and letting her finish the final step) could build confidence as well.
3 — Catch her doing something hard.
Maybe she’s singing a song with a lot of verses she’s memorized, or is wrestling with a zipper jacket and prevails! Comment, “That sure looked hard, and you did it! That takes a lot of persistence!” or something of the manner. Our voices become our kids’ inner voices, so slowly but surely, she’ll grow to believe persistence is something that not only is she fully capable of, but that she possesses already.Keep up the great work, Rachel!
So happy to help! Here are the two studies cited below:
PISA 2015 Worldwide Ranking – average score of math, science and reading
You also might find these fascinating as well!:
And if you haven’t taken our free workshop yet, I highly recommend! Just 1 video/day, 5 minutes each, 5 days total! You can sign up for free here:
othergoose.com/workshop/Hi Kelsey:
Oh, I’m so heartened by this question! It sounds like you’re doing a fantastic job fostering her curiosity so she can grow to love (and not resent!) facts. :) Well done!
I’d say continue to introduce her to precisely what it is that’s sparking her interest! She might surprise you by what she actually wants to know. (I remember when my daughter asked what her tshirt said and I told her, and she said: No, I want to know the LETTERS. She’d wanted a spelling lesson! Kids are wonderful at guiding their own learning experience!).
For basic letter practice, let her sit next to you and try writing a few letters together in whatever medium she’d like: crayons + paper, a stick in the sand, a finger in paint – anything goes! I’d keep it very short, and end before attention runs away entirely. You could also try our Letters Pack (get it free by saving your lesson credits!) here: https://othergoose.com/product/letters-pack/
From there, you can use natural opportunities for organic copywork with letters to grandparents, making grocery lists, and so on! Her skills will build from there. :)
Keep us posted!
Hi Stephanie:
We often use Overdrive (https://www.overdrive.com/) and/or Hoopla (https://www.hoopladigital.com/) with our local library, but here are a few others to consider!
http://en.childrenslibrary.org/
This service doesn’t have quite the variety, but you can “read” the books online with your kids and I’ve found some really good ones!https://www.storylineonline.net/
Actors reading classic books to your children!https://www.freechildrenstories.com/
Free to read with no signup or downloads. :)https://www.childrensbooksonline.org/library.htm
Many classics here!If you can’t find your exact Related Reading title, feel free to adapt and improvise. Or email us and we can help you select some good ones for your child’s age set and interests!
Hi Kristen:
Do keep us posted on how your son enjoys your lessons together —- I’d love to hear! Sending warm blessings your way.
xoxoI LOVE this idea, Cassie!
I had a friend create a custom birthday playlist where everyone submitted a song that reminded them of her 6-year-old, or a song they think she would like. They played it all week long!
Also – since it’s your whole family celebrating, consider a cake swap! Everyone’s name goes into a hat, and then each person gets to make a cake/treat for the person’s name they draw. Anything goes! 2 year old can make it on paper if you’re not into the baking mess yet… ;)
Great question! My thought is that an empathetic response will go a long way toward our kids finding a solution that works for them:
Often, in the case of art projects, our kids are simply disappointed that the vision isn’t translating into reality. As adults, we know how frustrating this can be, too!
Watch the above video, say “Show me the hard part” to your child, and then wait for a response. Depending on your child’s age, resist the temptation to fix anything, but instead, offer space for them to solve their own problem. Chances are, once a child’s frustration is voiced and heard, i.e. “Oh, you’re right – that is frustrating!” and he/she feels understood (active listening works great here), their brain will move into solutions mode rather than alarm mode.
From there, my daughter used to love crumpling up her pages and ripping them up if she hated what she saw, and I allowed it! We then saved the scraps in our scrap stash for a “mixed media” piece later, once her frustration had passed. Involve your kids in brainstorming solutions! Maybe they do want to learn to draw better, or maybe they just want to feel their disappointment for a bit. Both courses of action are understandable! :)
I hope this helps!!
Hi Amy:
This is a FANTASTIC question! There is quite an emotional adjustment that takes place when a learned structure sort of disintegrates — I know, for many of us, the first days of summer feel like a zoo when it comes to transitioning kids from desks to dens. ;)
The good news is that your kids are feeling safe to express themselves, and this sort of reaction is 100% normal. And the BETTER news is that your kids are learning a LOT through these sibling disagreements! I’d venture to say that the whining and crankiness is less a sign that something’s awry and more a sign that something new is on the horizon. Remember when a newborn would experience a growth spurt and be cranky for days leading up to it? This is precisely what our kids do! Consider their squabbles as tests they’re giving each other, i.e. Is this ok? Can you handle me like this? Am I safe with you?
I know that doesn’t make your job any easier. ;) For a more practical suggestion, I’m curious how it might feel to sit down with your kids and make a loose schedule for the day. Aim for the inchworm concept, i.e. togetherness, apart, togetherness, apart. See if you can fit in 3 anchor points into the day (an easy way to do this is to simply read aloud a book during a meal!) and let the kids fill in the blank spaces from there. If one needs more alone time than others, have him/her factor that into his/her schedule. Each kid can make/write/illustrate individualized copies of the “family” schedule, and post it where everyone can see or on individual doors. Again, let it be loose. It’s a rhythm, not a routine. But it might give them the comfort of added structure to know there’s a bit of a plan happening. ;)
I hope this is helpful for you, Amy — please keep us posted! We’re cheering you on.
xoxoHi Cassie:
Great question! In the past, we’ve had the kids set up an obstacle course with a hula hoop (or a simple rope/scarf laying on the grass in a circle) to weave in and out of. Or, a driveway “obstacle course” with chalk only using arrows and shapes or doodles as commands to run/jump/hop/skip however many times. ;) We’ve also got a tangle maze indoors on the docket for next week, so stay tuned for that! It’ll achieve a very similar effect.
So very thrilled you’re here and enjoying these connection prompts with your daughter!
My best advice is to try your hardest not to recreate school at home. It’s easy to think that because our kids are often away in the educational system for 4-8 hours daily that this must be the magic number they need to learn everything they need to know. But in truth, learning at home allows for far more flexibility, freedom, and focus! The process takes a fraction of the time.
I’ll be sharing more about this next week (stay tuned in the Announcements section!), but my suggestion is to keep it simple. Aim for 1 lesson/day, and consider these lessons as prompts. Follow your child’s lead as best as you can — the goal isn’t to complete the lesson; it’s to learn something new! So hold your expectations loosely and try your best not to place a specific outcome onto each learning experience. Your children will get precisely what they need from each! Aside from that, pair each lesson with read-alouds (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMJJ6SXQwLs), as well as free play outdoors (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-DHrDNX3s0). And our Youtube channel is full of archived parent chats that might come in handy when you’re in need of some encouragement. I’d start with the below as you transition!
How to homeschool multiple kids (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZiICWx4V_8)
Encouragement for chaotic learning moments (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBD_lhlJTtY)
How do we know they’re learning? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKN4M-TH6cE)
Getting your kids excited about a lesson (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NqfyW6wWDU)I hope this is helpful for you! Here to guide at any time.
Hi Emilie!
I can absolutely relate! For what it’s worth, 5 is a very developmentally-appropriate time for pushback (not that it makes it any easier, ha!). I’d recommend trying this method: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NqfyW6wWDU
I’ll also say that free play might be a really good thing for her right now as she transitions to more time at home. Let her play and play and play! Aim for 1 lesson daily and pair with read-alouds and free time outdoors. For now, rest assured that will be enough!
Cheering you on!
e.Hi Shannon:
Oh, I can ABSOLUTELY relate! Have you by any chance read Siblings Without Rivalry? It’s SO practical, and helpful, and a very easy read. The principles inside have absolutely changed the way I navigate my kids’ bickering: https://amzn.to/2SGx56D
And here’s a podcast you might find interesting, as well!: https://thehomeschoolsisters.com/2019/05/21/sibling-stuff/