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In Palm Springs area right now but moving to greater Sacramento/ Placer County in the fall. 2.5 y/o twins if anyone wants to connect.
My 4-year-old loves the Magic Treehouse series by Mary Pope Osborne. There’s adventure and cultivating a learning through books built right into the stories. We’re on book 9 and there’s still 19 more to go in the series, so plenty to enjoy!
Our screen time limit came less out of worry about disconnection and more from noticing that our preschooler had more meltdowns when he was allowed to watch more shows. Even GOOD shows, GENTLE shows. Mr. Rogers, Daniel Tiger, Winnie the Pooh etc.
He wasn’t even melting down about the shows themselves; he’d walk away from the screen on his own when the show was over. But for an hour or two after that, he would be on edge. So now our screen rule is that he’s allowed one 20ish minute show after his rest time, while I nurse the baby in the afternoon. And only if he remembers to ask for it himself. I won’t interrupt his tower building or coloring to offer a show.
This rule goes out the window if he’s sick, and then he gets a full 90 minute Winnie the Pooh or Disney Robin Hood — or BOTH — while absentmindedly sipping fluids and eating clementines. He still melts down when it’s over, but at least he’s hydrated.
BY THE WAY, if you think, “Oh, I remember liking Robin Hood, it’s all cute animals, I can get some chores done while he watches this,” maybe you, like me, have totally forgotten the plot of this movie. My kid got obsessed with it when we all had the flu this winter. I got to field questions about gallows, and taxes, and why some people like taxes and some people don’t, and now he shouts “DEATH TO TYRANTS” sometimes. A pox on the phony king of England!
We’re big Playful Parenting fans in our house. It dovetails nicely with How To Talk and Simplicity Parenting, but scratches my theater kid itch.
Thanks, y’all!
We tried a handful of things, and here’s what’s working best:
We raised the 3 year old’s bed. That’s … kinda it. It’s the same mattress, but instead of on the ground (he has an Ikea Kura bed, the reversible kind that we can turn into a bunk someday), we added slats and put the mattress on top of those. You know, the way it was designed.
We did this on Easter, after a sunrise church service and a skipped nap and LOTS of outside running around, so he was already out of his normal routine. We kept him running from 5am to 7:30pm without stopping, then showed him how big his “new bed” was, and he was too exhausted to wake up in the middle of the night.
We let him overhear us tell each other and anyone who would listen how proud we were of how he stayed in his bed until it was light outside, so he got proud of himself about it, too.
He’s been waiting until 6ish in the morning to come crawl into our bed and ask me when he can hunt tigers in the (midwestern) forest (preserve), and I can live with that.
A week in, it’s mostly stuck. If he has to go to the bathroom in the night, he needs a back rub to fall asleep again, but he doesn’t scream and wake up his sister now. Something about changing his sleeping environment a little jolted him out of that habit. If the bed hadn’t been adjustable, switching out his bedding or rearranging the furniture might have accomplished the same thing. I think a day of all our routines being different helped out with a hard reset, too.
Every week or two I make a gigantic batch of these in the blender. Both the 11 month old and the 3.5 year old love them. They feel like they’re eating cake, but the sweetness is all from fruit. I like them, too, with a little cream cheese or maple syrup.
It’s a forgiving enough recipe that if you want to swap out some carrot with zucchini or banana with applesauce, it still comes out fine. I eyeball most of the measurements with the markings on the blender so that I have fewer dishes afterward.
2 cups whole wheat flour (I usually replace at least half of this with almond meal or quinoa flour, for a variety of protein)
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup sunflower or coconut oil
1/2 cup dried dates, seeded and finely chopped into a paste (unless you have a serious blender, then you can skip the chopping)
3 ripe bananas (1 1/4 cups)
1 1/2 cups grated carrots (about 3 medium) (again, if you’ve got a Vitamix or something, you can just roughly chop instead of grating them)
1/2 cup yogurt (Greek is ideal, but whatever you have is fine)
2 eggs
splash of vanillaPreheat oven to 350F. Line a muffin tin. This will make about 15 regular muffins, but I usually stretch it to 12 muffins and 24 mini muffins.
Sift together the flour, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt.
In Vitamix, combine the bananas and carrots, dates, and oil. Add in the yogurt and the eggs. Add the flour mixture and stir until everything just comes together. Spoon into the prepared muffin tins.
Bake for about 25-30 minutes (or 15ish minutes for mini muffins) or until a toothpick tests clean in the center of the cake.
They only keep for a couple of days on the counter, but they’ll keep for a week in the fridge.
My favorite parenting podcast is ‘Unruffled’ by Janet Lansbury – she answers listener’s question so the episodes are short and sweet. Her voice is so calming and her advice helps to remind me of the parent I strive to be.
Also, NPR’s ‘How I Built This’ is really interesting if you love Shark Tank… its kind of the reverse of Shark Tank. It’s so fun to see how some of your favorite brands and stores got their start. (My fav’s are Dyson, Kate Spade, Sara Blakely (Spanx), and Kendra Scott)
I’m going to have to follow this thread closely because I imagine we will be in the same boat very soon. We also have a 3.5 year old that thinks our bed is the place to be. She actually told me that our bed is a “10” comfortable and her’s is only a “1” comfortable. She almost won me over with her logic and reasoning, but we’d prefer she sleeps in her own bed. We also have 5.5 month old twins who I’m sure will be teething within the next couple of months. Good luck to you mamas in the trenches right now!
Hi! I’m south of Boston – anyone else from Massachusetts? I would love to have more local community : )
Yes, Caroline! That would be great! We’re on the Eastern Shore right across the bay. Thank you so much!
oh goodness, I WISH I had some tips for you. Currently in that fun dance right along with you! Wooooooo!!! I’m rather lucky that at least when our little guy crawls in with us he decides it’s time to go back to sleep. But take him back to his bed, he’ll scream bloody murder. ***eye rolllll**
LOL Kenneth, I laughed out loud while reading that, but it’s true! It’s 100% true and a great tactic!
I would like to echo everything the Other Goose Keymaster mentioned. They will continue to learn right alongside you. and of course these Other Goose activities weekly that only require a few dedicated minutes here and there. I found it definitely helped to have things prepped. Whether it’s an activity that doesn’t require too much clean up that I prepped the night before, or some food in the fridge that is easy to eat finger food, it will help in times when the toddler wants some attention but the baby needs it too.
Such an exciting time! I am 2 weeks postpartum and I’ll add just two things: It always seems like the transition is hardest for the toddler. And I do my very best to not always blame the baby for what can not happen right now. For example, when the toddler wants help pouring a drink, “I say, I can get that for. you in 5 minutes.” As opposed to: “I am nursing the baby right now, you’ll have to wait.” Because I think sometimes toddlers begin to begrudge the baby. But asking for their help to get a diaper or wipe out for you, teaching them to diaper their baby doll, singing the toddler’s favorite songs to help calm a fussy baby. Including the toddler as much as possible has helped mine along.
Also, one funny thing: the toddler (who has been weaned for more than a year) asked to nurse when we were cuddling. I expressed a sip of my milk in a cup for her, and she said, “YUMMY! More, please!” and I thought, oh no! What have I done!?? I gave her a little more. Then my other two kids wanted to try. So we had a little breastmilk tasting party. Inside I was nervous that everyone would want this all the time now. But it satisfied the curiosity and no one has asked for mom’s milk again.Hi Allison! Wishing you all the best during this exciting time. My best advice is to outsource as much as you can and accept help when it’s offered. When our second was born I still tried to do everything myself and ended up really burned out. When our third came along, I was much better at receiving help and was able to be specific. If someone asked, “how can I help?” I wouldn’t be afraid to say grocery pick up, or laundry, and watching my other two so I could have some time to regroup. And mostly, be gentle with yourself. It takes the time it takes (and it’s different for everyone) to settle into a new rhythm when there’s a new addition to the family. Sending love!
