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My youngest of 4 is a runner. As soon as we get outside, he bolts. It has become a safety issue. We obviously talk about stopping, looking for cars, holding mommy’s hand (or a sibling’s). Sometimes he listens but so many times he runs into the road, through the parking lot, or runs off in the store. He’s almost 3. None of my other kids were like this. Tips?
Hey Debbie! Obviously every little one is different, but this worked for us. My aunt (fake aunt…you know the family friend that’s so close) told me that her daughter kept running. So one day she followed her quickly to the street and just right before she got to the edge she SCREAMED her daughter’s name, like an absolute crazy person, and scooped her daughter “harshly” into her arms, YELLING in her face for her to, “NEVER DO THAT AGAIN YOU COULD HAVE BEEN HIT I WOULD NEVER WANT THAT TO HAPPEN TO YOU SO NEVER DO THAT AGAAAAAAAAIIIIIN! Etc. Etc.”
She said the neighbors probably thought she was a lunatic. But she said her thoughts were, “If a bus was driving down the street about to hit her, what would my reaction be? I can imagine that scenario and the absolutely horrible outcome…but Rachel (her daughter) could never envision the severity, until I made the moment real for her. And she never ran into the street’s again.” She also said she didn’t have to do that for her son. So nothing is one size fits all.
SO, I did that with my daughter and she also never ran into the street again. She was about 3 when I pulled out my Oscar winning performance at my street’s edge. :) But if I’m honest, it actually drummed up real tears and I just stared into my daughter’s eyes so she could see it.
“It was an honor just being nominated.” ;)
I like Kenneth’s suggestion! What has worked for me is just to make running off always something that we punished them for. So basically, however you punish, do it EVERY time they did that. And immediately. So if you use timeout, then get them and sit them down on the sidewalk in timeout. Show them that their safety is the most important thing and that you care enough to discipline them until they remember to obey and stay close. THey will get sick of you doing it hopefully. :)
I’ve never had a runner but always made my girls hold my hand since they were tiny walking across the street or in a parking lot. We had one epic tantrum related to this and I did not give in to one bit. She never pushed the issue again. With my second, we still hold hands but I let them run ahead of me on the side walk and when they get to a street they either just stop or I call red light. We have played red light/green light a lot in fun situations away from traffic and I know they will absolutely stop 100 percent of the time. Of course you know your children best and what will work for them but thought I would share in case it can help you in these types of situations or similar.
It’s so fascinating to see everyone’s tactic and perspective. But it really does seem like Suzanne’s comment (boiled down) is the main thread…just stay consistent.
And at the same time, I have to remind myself, if/when other issues come up, I need to do the same, STAY CONSISTENT! No sense doing what works, JUST when it’s “important.”
Cheers everyone!
LOL Kenneth, I laughed out loud while reading that, but it’s true! It’s 100% true and a great tactic!
My child started running as soon as he could around 18 months when we were in public- parks, grocery stores, any store, pickup from daycare, etc. I tried ALL the things to get him to stop but none worked. When he was 3 I saw someone post in a local moms group a similar post to yours asking for advice from parents of “Reformed runners”. 8 replies and every single one said the same thing- its due to sensory processing and is flight response and to have child evaluated for Occupational therapy and it helps immensely. Light bulb went off in my head! I had my son evaluated at 3 for OT services- he qualified and has been in OT for 9 months and it has been a godsend! He rarely runs from me in public. We have learned tools for how he can calm himself down and types of sensory inputs he needs. Good luck! It will get better!
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