We all want to make the most of the time we have with our kids, right? But how can we squeeze every morsel of magic out of each minute when we have so little time and energy to spare? Between projects to complete and floors to sweep and pancakes to flip, our days are fuller than full. Do we really need another measurement to stack ourselves up against? Do we really need another to do list?
Not at all. We need just two things: a WHAT and a WHY. Let me explain…
Finding Your What
A “what” is exactly what it sounds like: an outward rhythm, a tradition to establish, a ritual to rely on. It’s a thing that you and your child can always expect to look forward to, as often as possible. It can be big like Saturday morning hikes, or it can be small like a butterscotch before bed. Your “what” is simply something to keep you and your family tethered to a future moment where – no matter how busy and full and frenzied the day has become – you know you’ll be connecting soon.
Pro Tip: Tailor your “what” to something that you love doing, or else it will feel like another chore! It can be anything — birdwatching in the morning, a cinnamon sugar toast treat in the afternoon, a documentary on Friday nights, all wrapped up in fuzzy pajamas.
One of our Other Goose members recently shared a fun “what” she keeps with her oldest daughter. She puts the younger kids to bed and then as soon as they’re asleep, she’ll pull her oldest out of bed for kombucha and a game of chess. It’s not fancy, she says, and they only do it once a week or so. But it keeps them connected, and it makes all of those less magical moments worth navigating as they look forward to their special time together.
Finding Your Why
So what about the rest of the time? All those moments where you can’t sneak away for your beloved tradition? All of those moments where the dishes are piled high and the kettle is boiling and the baby is screaming and there’s no magic to be found in any of it?
That’s where your “why” comes in. Think of your “why” like an inward refrain, rather than an outward rhythm. It’s more of a mindset, a throughline – something to keep you focused on what matters all day long. An inward refrain reminds you of your true north — to make the most of the time you have together.
We have an Other Goose member who keeps just one inward refrain: Look at my kids and smile every time they walk in the room. That’s it! Being happy to see her kids is really important to her; that’s her “why”. Another Other Goose member uses a favorite Plato quote as her “why”: Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.
Maybe your “why” is rooted in a family mission, or maybe it’s a favorite quote or a few simple words. Whatever it is – find it and repeat it as often as you can. The more you rely on it, the more that refrain will guide you toward a day that infuses beauty and grace and, yes, magic! – no matter what.
What you’ll find with these 2 simple concepts – the WHAT and the WHY – is that you and your kids will both have a built-in system of connection every single day. Yes, there will be spills and mistakes and mayhem. Yes, there will be chaos amidst the beauty. But by carving out a few moments of magic (and bringing magic into every moment otherwise!), you’ll rest easier knowing that you’re making the most of your time together – day after day after day.
p.s. Looking for a few “what”s to guide your days? Try our very favorites here.